Well it began like this...
Our dear college had announced the semester hols for two months. I'm this lazy guy who never bothers to hava proper haircut on time. So I let it grow : no-holds-barred. Well my GRE exam popped up in the middle so I had to go in for a trim cos I no where resembled the glum guy in the passport. I dint want to miss my exam due to lack of admissible proof of identity. I let the barber work his magic on me and viola! within a few hours I was back to my passport hairstyle days. GRE' I blew it! so I was least bothered after the exam as to how my hair grew(and my hair grows pretty fast or must say too fast)
Fast forward to Delhi. I'm cooly relaxed in my home watchin apna favourite Balakrishna's movie. Bell rings. I open the door and find my mom's so called socialite friends. They are getting bored gosssiping so have dropped in here. They lay eyes on me and a smirk comes upon their faces. They head to talk directly to my mom...meanwhile the cable has gone out and i'm fidgeting with the wire. The ladies see me and ask my mom..."Never seen that cable repair guy in the appartments; who is he?"....I was shocked. How could they mistake me for a cable repair guy?
I'm too shocked to say anything and leave my home in a hurry; and make it to the terrace to cool my senses.
After sometime I spy the ladies leaving in their bigass car and I quickly return home. Bala Krishna's movies are so much fun to watch. They seem to defy all the logis of physics,biology and fiction. (where else do you see a guy who can move a train backwards with a single movement with his finger....got the movie?)
I have to carry the laundry to the dhobhi before i can switch on the TV again. The damn lift is some where at the top floor and it's a big pain in the a$$ to carry that huge bundle (of my clothes) on my tender shoulders and go all the way to the dhobi's den. I feel like i'm Atlas carrying the load of the world.
I reach the ground floor and an old lady spots me and says, " hey dobhiwala...humare kapde laya?" WTF. If it had not been for the lady age god knows what I would have done. I walk up calmly to her and say, " Maaji mein koi dhobi wala nahi hoon. Mein 2nd floor pein rehta hoon aur chuttiyon ke liye aaya hoon." lady says," galti ho gayee. Lekin vesh-busha(appearance) sey toh dobhi hi lagte ho. Maine socha tha shayad kaam pey naye aye ho!" I'm flabbergasted but move on. Mission accomplished i deliver the goods at the location and rush back home for Balaiah's movie. Now our new servant had come. She was just one week into employment. She asks my mom," aunty jhi bhaiyya Hyd mein kya karte hain? " My mom in her casual tone says 'mechanical engineering'. The maid to show off her extra intelligence says, "oh! gaddiya aur pani key motor teek karthe hain. Humure ghar pey motor ka problem hai. Kya bhaiyya repair kar sakthe hain?" My mom is unable to hold her laughter and I'm about to blow my fuse. Luckily Bala Krishna came to my aid with his superman antics.
I'm seriously watchin the movie ROTFL...when my mom comes and switches off the TV. This happens when she has some earth shattering news to deliver. She says, " Ippudu vachina ma friends adugutunnaru neeku any mental problem vunda?"
Holy cow! me and a psychotic? That's a tag i've never got. I ask her the reason for their comments. She says that my long tress of hair combined with my rugged look and sudden abrupt exit from home. Man-o-man...ladies read so much into hairstyles.
I said, "Naa bochu naa istam. Vaal ke yenti problem?". My mom gives a long lecture on hair;grooming so on and so forth. And her punchline," Hair proper ga ley pothe neeku yevaru pillani ivvaru!". I was dumbstruck. But I couldn't miss Bala Krishna's movie at any cost so I tell her we will talk about this latter and switch on the Idiot box again. Balakrishna's wig is so craftily placed...I imagine myself with a wig...egad!
Movie over...I start hunting for my I-pod but cant find it anywhere. Mom dangles the earphones in front of me and asks it that was what I was looking for. She candidly says," Either you let me set your hair or mister you can forget your pod." Reluctantly I agreed. I hate it when anyone meddles with my hair; but no other go. She starts....First she gets hairpins. Ya hair pins. And struck them tightly in my hair. It was a strange experience. I felt like my flow of creativity was being stemmed. I protested; but to no avail. Next applies some oil I dunno the brand but it had a horrid oil smell. Then next she let it stay for a few hours and the washed it away (while all this was being done I was happily playing NFS). Infact i felt like I was in a beauty parlour. The oil seems to have had no effect my hair is still standing erect all spikes. My mom doesn't give up so easily. So this time a spl ayurvedic oil. This one smells even worse. I begin to act as if i'm falling ill. But no use she presists. She washes off da oil after some time again. This time the she places clips tightly into my hair. And tells me to let it stay.
Meanwhile I had to go down and collect something from the driver Sukhwinder Singh. And I forgot to put on my cap. So all these hairpins were shining in their pristine glory. Sukh sees me and his initial reaction- ROTFL! He says,"oye! saab jhi Delhi mein bahut ajeeb hairstlyle dekhe par aap jaisa koi nahi. Tum Hyd waale great ho. Hume bhi yeh naya style sikha dho mere baal bhi mudthe nahi." I realised that I had forgotten to put my cap on. The watchman also saw me and startted laughing. I hurried left after collecting what I had come to collect. I waiting for the lift to open. It finally arrived and OMG five beautiful girls stepped out at once. They all started giggling seeing the clips in my hair. I was in the dumps. I just dashed up the stairs with the girls laughing wildly in the background. This hair thing would surely make me the laughing stock in the entire appartment. I finally got rid of them after a few hours...hey my hair had bent like crops in a feild which are trampled by a tractor. My mom was impressed by the results and applied something else. I was becoming a guinea pig. My dad was a chemical engineer, seems like some of his scientific traits had rubbed on to my mom. Finally it was all over. By the end of it I had neatly bent hair and was looking cheerful.
Evening I went down to the groundfloor to check my mailbox. I collected the mail and was about to go away when some one tapped slightly on my shoulder. It was an old man now. He said," Post man das din sey mein tumko doondhn raha hoon. Meri ek important chitti due hai. leekar aaye ho kya?" Not again.....................
